Here is a guide to the point system.
Simple Duties: | |
You make the bed | +1 |
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows | 0 |
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets | -1 |
You leave the toilet seat up | -5 |
You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty | 0 |
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex | -1 |
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom | -2 |
You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings | +5 |
But return with beer | -5 |
You check out a suspicious noise at night | 0 |
You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing | 0 |
You check out a suspicious noise and it's something | +5 |
You pummel it with a six iron | +10 |
It's her father | -10 |
Social Engagements: | |
You stay by her side the entire party | 0 |
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy | -2 |
Named Tiffany | -4 |
Tiffany is a dancer | -6 |
Tiffany has implants | -8 |
Her Birthday: | |
You take her out to dinner | 0 |
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar | +1 |
Okay, it is a sports bar | -2 |
And it's all-you-can-eat night | -3 |
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team | -10 |
A Night Out With The Boys: | |
Go out with a pal | -5 |
And the pal is happily married | -4 |
Or frighteningly single | -7 |
And he drives a Mustang | -10 |
With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED) | -15 |
A Night Out: | |
You take her to a movie | +2 |
You take her to a movie she likes | +4 |
You take her to a movie you hate | +6 |
You take her to a movie you like | -2 |
It's called DeathCop 3 | -3 |
Which features cyborgs having sex | -9 |
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans | -15 |
Your Physique: | |
You develop a noticeable potbelly | -15 |
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it | +10 |
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts | -30 |
You say "I don't give a damn because you have one too" | -800 |
The Big Question: | |
She asks, "Do I look fat?" | -5 |
You hesitate in responding | -10 |
You reply, "Where?" | -35 |
Communication: | |
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression | 0 |
When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes | +5 |
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV | +10 |
She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep | -20 |
3 comments:
xD I must show this to my boyfriend. He'd get like a negative 1000
Point system for women:
No sex ............ -5000
Deep throat........ +10
Swallows........... +5
Cuddles............ -20
HAHAHAHA. Awesome!
Also, ironically, I found you through BlogRush. I suppose it works.
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