Friendships are a form of relationship built on different types of love. When man and woman join in love and relationship, intimacy overshadows the arrangement, however in friendship a different type of intimacy exists which makes the relationship work. Friendships work with the exception that sex is not included in the scenario. Some friends later commit to a sexual relationship, which in turn can in the long term lead to either commitment or separation.
Friendships which are long lasting often include the very ingredients that can make relationships work. Friends may cause each other agitation, frustration, or even unintentional harm but they will work together to find resolution to their relationship problem.
Friendship is a form of commitment between two or more people, and often as a group will join in activities, entertainment, and communication. True friends will remain true to the end. Friends will not interfere with each other’s life, unless said friend sees the need to address an issue that has the possibility to cause his/her friend harm.
True friends will not hold back when addressing issues with friends. While the friend will not hold back he or she will consider the other person’s feelings when addressing issues. Friends watch your back, and that is a true symbol of love which endures throughout the trials and tribulations of any relationship.
Friends may disagree at times, but both parties will apologise for their part in instigating said disagreement. However you can be quite sure that a true friend will tell you when you are wrong, even agreeing to disagree with you while holding their own thoughts on the matter.
Friendships that develop into intimate relationships often find that their union will work due to fact that friendship came before intimacy. On this basis friendship prior commitment is wise as the two involved have knowledge of the other’s behaviors, habits, personality, skills, etc.
Love and relationships built on true friendship will last through all sorts of habits, behaviours, personality flaws, providing violence or repeated actions of inconsideration and disrespect is not in the mix.
When mates disrespect each other, or show ongoing inconsideration, the relationship will fail, since friendship, love and the elements that compose love are lacking.
Disrespect expands further than most people think. Learning about the beliefs, traditions, and standards of others is intelligent if you consider that an important element of love and relationships is respect. If you start out as a friend this will help as you are in a better position to understand another’s behaviors, habits and personality. Additionally you are in a prime position to assess and gain insight into his/her moral standards, traditions, and belief structure.
Beliefs are inherent to the informed mind. However since standards appear to be somewhat lower today; unformed or even uninformed beliefs seem to be based on inconsistency and dishonesty. Superficial beliefs rarely stand firm. When a person lacks evidence to support their beliefs it would appear that faulty thinking is at fault. Beliefs are either concrete or superficial. If both parties in the new relationship do not share the same or even similar belief structures it maybe that the accelerated friendship will not last.
It would appear that what determines the long term outcome of friendship, love and relationship depends on the innate formation of the persons involved?
What about personal compatibility, what role does it play in friendship, love and relationship…
Compatibility by definition means to exist together in agreement. When two compatible people agree to start a relationship it remains to be seen whether the agreement to co-habit will last. The agreement can and will change – everyone matures and grows as should the relationship. However a basic question is at what rate do the changes occur? Will the partnership remain equal? People are not the same. Some grow and learn exponentially while others remain stagnant.
Maybe one person is in the workforce earning a great of money while his/her partner remains at home as a home wife/husband. If these two people do not make it their business to support each other then success can cast a long shadow as temptations loom and people are hurt.
On the other hand incompatibility can cause volcanic disturbance to a relationship through the inconvenience and distress engendered. While the definition illustrates a possible partnership breakdown or failure into the future many relationships built on incompatibility have proved enduring, particularly when minds were changed after facts were gathered, which in turn led to a change in personal convictions.
Personal conviction is basic. Truth will out. And when you have truth, you have conviction, no one can argue with you…and on this basis truth, love, and respect in personal interaction supports the inherent structure that starts in friendship and continues into love and long term relationships.
a.a.gallagher
copyright 2007
No comments:
Post a Comment